Rapport Based Relating
Finally... simple, powerful tools to ease conflict between you and your kids/students
In our modern society, families tend to live in small units of one or two adults with a couple of kids, which means that everyone is often overloaded. Classrooms have one teacher to handle twenty to thirty five kids. It's easy for adults to slip into the 'do what I say because' way of being, just to get through. Adults are under-resourced, overworked, have busy schedules and sometimes just have to make things happen, no matter what the cost. We get it. We've been there. It kinda sucks but for most people there don't seem to be any real alternatives.
We'd like to offer some tools to help make things a little easier between kids and adults, and shine a light on why the old ways aren't working. Lee developed Rapport Based Relating after years of working in various educational institutions and witnessing first hand that the traditional 'shout and shame' approach of child wrangling isn't just ineffective, it's potentially damaging to a child's self esteem and sense of internal authority.
Rapport Based Relating isn't just another theory, but a set of real, powerful tools we have honed and refined in our ReWild Tribe / ReWild Your Child family camps. We use open ended questions to unlock children's individual talents and will never tell them the way the world is; instead we ask questions to find out how their world is, and based on what we discover, have real and meaningful communication where we respect the autonomy of each child.
In our modern society, families tend to live in small units of one or two adults with a couple of kids, which means that everyone is often overloaded. Classrooms have one teacher to handle twenty to thirty five kids. It's easy for adults to slip into the 'do what I say because' way of being, just to get through. Adults are under-resourced, overworked, have busy schedules and sometimes just have to make things happen, no matter what the cost. We get it. We've been there. It kinda sucks but for most people there don't seem to be any real alternatives.
We'd like to offer some tools to help make things a little easier between kids and adults, and shine a light on why the old ways aren't working. Lee developed Rapport Based Relating after years of working in various educational institutions and witnessing first hand that the traditional 'shout and shame' approach of child wrangling isn't just ineffective, it's potentially damaging to a child's self esteem and sense of internal authority.
Rapport Based Relating isn't just another theory, but a set of real, powerful tools we have honed and refined in our ReWild Tribe / ReWild Your Child family camps. We use open ended questions to unlock children's individual talents and will never tell them the way the world is; instead we ask questions to find out how their world is, and based on what we discover, have real and meaningful communication where we respect the autonomy of each child.
We’re interested in helping children to be empowered. We recognise that they are absolutely as valuable, as worthy of respect, and have as much right to a voice as any adult. We truly and deeply believe this at a very real level. It’s not a belief, it’s a knowing. When we move into relationship with kids from this place, children feel recognised and heard. We start from agreements, and from agreements we move into a cooperative dance and a meaningful, nourishing relationship where everyone's needs are respected.
This workshop is a great balance of theory and practice to help us embody new skills. We'll use role play to go through real life scenarios of conflict between kids and adults. We freeze frame, rewind and troubleshoot at various points in the action, looking for what is actually going on, what we want to achieve, and how our old patterns are tripping us up.
Using the four core actions and four core questions of RBR, anyone can access a new way of relating with kids, whether it is your own children, your students, nephews and nieces or kids you work with. This workshop is a must for anyone who is frustrated in their work in educational institutions, outdoor education, or is simply feeling overwhelmed or in need of more clarity and support with family life at home.
For personalised mentoring in a family setting or over the phone, contact Lee for his 'family whispering' and parent coaching sessions, on 0466 535 549.
Testimonials
‘Lee and Gina saved my family,’ Amanda, 44 with Bailey 14, Maddox 12 and Jami 9
‘Lee has an incredible gift in his ability to connect with children. He captivates them, motivates and inspires them, and the children (and parents!) instinctively trust him.’ Bethany, 36 with Ewan 10
‘Hi Lee and Gina, I had to write to you to say thank you. It’s a week since we worked together and I feel like a blindfold has come off my life. Amali and I are communicating for the first time in years. The agreements are working. I see my son with new eyes, and can see how I have been thinking the problem was all him, when in reality I have been creating it as well. We have had a couple of conflicts since we saw you, but that trick you taught us really works, we get to stop things before they go to defcon 5, while we are both still reasonable, and before we get locked in the old pattern. He has even agreed to less time on the computer and last night he washed up!!
I am so so grateful. I feel like we have a real shot at getting through the next few years with an actual relationship. Thank you for giving me back my son.’ Cassie T, 42 with Amali 12
‘My son wanted to move in with Lee the moment he met him. I have watched Lee on camps and what he does looks like magic. He starts talking and instantly the kids are attentive. He never raises his voice, and the kids just want to do what he asks. I’ve been bringing in his techniques and they have completely changed the way Angus and I interact. He talks to me now about everything. Thank you Lee for the magic.’ Belaya, 48 with Angus 15
‘Hey Lee, thanks for showing my mum that I am not a compete dickhead,’ Brandon, 15
‘Can you come to my school and talk to all my teachers?’ Jessica, 13
‘I don’t get so angry all the time and mum and dad are being nice to me now.’ Lily, 8
‘Hi Lee and Gina. The role play was epic. My dad has stopped shouting so much and we’re going camping this weekend, which is cool. We’re going fishing.’ Cameron 11
This workshop is a great balance of theory and practice to help us embody new skills. We'll use role play to go through real life scenarios of conflict between kids and adults. We freeze frame, rewind and troubleshoot at various points in the action, looking for what is actually going on, what we want to achieve, and how our old patterns are tripping us up.
Using the four core actions and four core questions of RBR, anyone can access a new way of relating with kids, whether it is your own children, your students, nephews and nieces or kids you work with. This workshop is a must for anyone who is frustrated in their work in educational institutions, outdoor education, or is simply feeling overwhelmed or in need of more clarity and support with family life at home.
For personalised mentoring in a family setting or over the phone, contact Lee for his 'family whispering' and parent coaching sessions, on 0466 535 549.
Testimonials
‘Lee and Gina saved my family,’ Amanda, 44 with Bailey 14, Maddox 12 and Jami 9
‘Lee has an incredible gift in his ability to connect with children. He captivates them, motivates and inspires them, and the children (and parents!) instinctively trust him.’ Bethany, 36 with Ewan 10
‘Hi Lee and Gina, I had to write to you to say thank you. It’s a week since we worked together and I feel like a blindfold has come off my life. Amali and I are communicating for the first time in years. The agreements are working. I see my son with new eyes, and can see how I have been thinking the problem was all him, when in reality I have been creating it as well. We have had a couple of conflicts since we saw you, but that trick you taught us really works, we get to stop things before they go to defcon 5, while we are both still reasonable, and before we get locked in the old pattern. He has even agreed to less time on the computer and last night he washed up!!
I am so so grateful. I feel like we have a real shot at getting through the next few years with an actual relationship. Thank you for giving me back my son.’ Cassie T, 42 with Amali 12
‘My son wanted to move in with Lee the moment he met him. I have watched Lee on camps and what he does looks like magic. He starts talking and instantly the kids are attentive. He never raises his voice, and the kids just want to do what he asks. I’ve been bringing in his techniques and they have completely changed the way Angus and I interact. He talks to me now about everything. Thank you Lee for the magic.’ Belaya, 48 with Angus 15
‘Hey Lee, thanks for showing my mum that I am not a compete dickhead,’ Brandon, 15
‘Can you come to my school and talk to all my teachers?’ Jessica, 13
‘I don’t get so angry all the time and mum and dad are being nice to me now.’ Lily, 8
‘Hi Lee and Gina. The role play was epic. My dad has stopped shouting so much and we’re going camping this weekend, which is cool. We’re going fishing.’ Cameron 11
DATES for our 2019 RBR WORKSHOPs:
June 1-2 Central Coast
August 10-11 Canberra
August 23-25 Sydney
How It Works:
These workshops are for parents, teachers, youth workers; anyone who works with kids/teens/young adults.
All workshops run over a weekend.
There is an online evening seminar (via Zoom video conference) on the Saturday, 6pm-8pm. (Please note: the Saturday evening seminar is an important part of the workshop, not an optional extra. This is where we establish the framework and shared language for the rest of the weekend)
Then the hands-on Sunday workshop runs 9am - 5pm.
During the Sunday workshop we unpack the principles, practices and tools of the RBR approach and give you supported opportunities to play with them in pairs or small groups.
Following the workshop, there are two further 2-hour online group video calls (via Zoom) at fortnightly intervals. This is a chance to go deeper, to iron out the wrinkles, to get support from Lee and from the group, and to help embed the new practices and principles in your daily life.
For those who have been through the workshop, there is the opportunity to join ongoing fortnightly or monthly group calls with Lee. These can be a powerful resource - a way to touch back in with the RBR culture and 'fill your cup'.
Cost:
$250 per participant, which includes the full day workshop plus 6 hours of ongoing group online calls.
If you have already participated in one of these workshops and would like to refresh and/or deepen your work with RBR, you are very welcome. There is so much ground to cover, each workshop only focuses on the areas most relevant/useful to those attending. This means we never run the same workshop twice. Returning participants pay $200 (as do Bluegum mentors who have been on camp with us in the last 12 months).
Stay in touch and find the latest news and articles on RBR here:
https://www.facebook.com/rapportbasedrelating/
Email Jo for further information - longhouse@bluegumbushcraft.com.au
Or phone Lee directly for a chat - 0466535549
NB If you would like to host an RBR workshop for your community, just email Lee to discuss - lee@bluegumbushcraft.com.au
August 10-11 Canberra
August 23-25 Sydney
How It Works:
These workshops are for parents, teachers, youth workers; anyone who works with kids/teens/young adults.
All workshops run over a weekend.
There is an online evening seminar (via Zoom video conference) on the Saturday, 6pm-8pm. (Please note: the Saturday evening seminar is an important part of the workshop, not an optional extra. This is where we establish the framework and shared language for the rest of the weekend)
Then the hands-on Sunday workshop runs 9am - 5pm.
During the Sunday workshop we unpack the principles, practices and tools of the RBR approach and give you supported opportunities to play with them in pairs or small groups.
Following the workshop, there are two further 2-hour online group video calls (via Zoom) at fortnightly intervals. This is a chance to go deeper, to iron out the wrinkles, to get support from Lee and from the group, and to help embed the new practices and principles in your daily life.
For those who have been through the workshop, there is the opportunity to join ongoing fortnightly or monthly group calls with Lee. These can be a powerful resource - a way to touch back in with the RBR culture and 'fill your cup'.
Cost:
$250 per participant, which includes the full day workshop plus 6 hours of ongoing group online calls.
If you have already participated in one of these workshops and would like to refresh and/or deepen your work with RBR, you are very welcome. There is so much ground to cover, each workshop only focuses on the areas most relevant/useful to those attending. This means we never run the same workshop twice. Returning participants pay $200 (as do Bluegum mentors who have been on camp with us in the last 12 months).
Stay in touch and find the latest news and articles on RBR here:
https://www.facebook.com/rapportbasedrelating/
Email Jo for further information - longhouse@bluegumbushcraft.com.au
Or phone Lee directly for a chat - 0466535549
NB If you would like to host an RBR workshop for your community, just email Lee to discuss - lee@bluegumbushcraft.com.au